Scrambling upon the keyboard in his cramped New York studio apartment, Eddie’s sunken in tired eyes fixated on the numbers displayed before him.
‘For the average human, it can take 21 days to break a habit- and on the higher end up to 66…’
And yet he still couldn’t kick the habit after 4 months- 122 days of living with the silence he’d lived most of his life with, yet it was so suffocating with the best friend he once considered a nuisance, gone.
Few of the habits he’d be trying to kick is calling to a creature who wouldn’t respond- talking to himself- looking at his wounds and expecting them to heal on their own-explaining things he did not need to explain- even still referring to himself as a unit.
“The lethal Protector…” He mumbled out loud, aching for something to respond- even something snarky- but nothing other than the rustle of the ac unit acting up again answers him.
You’d think the government would buy him something that wasn’t second hand and more rust then actual working machine. His eyes fix onto the roaring machine and he stands up, shutting the laptop screen as he reaches a sputtering hunk of junk. The chill that rushed his skin as he stood in front of it was foreign to the feverish warmth he was so acquainted with while he was bound with the alien. With a few strikes of his palm, and a plethora of irritated grunts, it silences under the force and he sighs, a smile as a thought crosses his mind.
“You would have tore through this and…had us-...me buy a new one- at least I can keep my wallet a little bit full…buddy…”
The words grit against his throat, a sharp inhale trying to keep his emotions from rushing out. He’d already had his mandated cry session in the morning when his dreams got a little too real- those tendrils burning his muscles and fluttering his sensitive skin just right as the distorted voice echoed in his cranium.
Last time he let himself wallow in his newfound emptiness, he had made an indent in the bed- only leaving his slump to reach the bridge that peers at the statue his friend dreamed to see…describing each detail of her beauty like perhaps some how he could hear him…like deep down he was hiding away… somewhere where Eddie could still have him.
Though as each day passes, the world only seems to get quieter and quieter, which was hard for a place like New York to be…but it didn’t matter where he went, the quiet always seemed to haunt him.
As he attempts to collect his thoughts before they slip into a tornado of unwavering survivor's guilt and aching for the companionship he lost, his gaze catches the souvenir of the Lady Liberty herself. He’d bought it in hopes to stop his daily need to go gander at the statue for hours, reminiscing on the old times. But it just has become a constant reminder of his friend’s wish that never came true.
After his weeping this morning he already took a walk out to go see her, admiring her in silence as he teased his puffy face with calloused hands, allowing a few tears to fall. To any passerby he perhaps looked like some patriotic lunatic sobbing at the mere sight of the statue, but there were a few usual regulars that had started up a conversation with him and learned the truth- well the malformed truth.
Eddie just talked of his best friend who passed before seeing the statue…and how he visited it to remember them by. No need to mention that his best friend was an alien that had sacrificed his life so he could live, an alien that barely left this side since they met- that the creature was literally bound to him as they had become one- how each moment Venom was gone, Eddie felt lost- how his own yearning made him so sick even thinking of the black goop for too long made him throw up.
But otherwise it was the truth.
It was barely past dawn when he reached her, and now the sun was setting and he felt the lady calling to him- or rather his need to talk to his friend again were gnawing at his heels to get them moving.
Though he would talk openly to him, even sometimes turning expecting a head to just appear from his shoulder- he felt their connection strongest when at the bridge, leaned up against the railing as the salty air lapped at his senses.
It wasn’t long before his apartment keys were in his hands and he was headed out the door- nearly stumbling over the awkward lip just before the door.
Eddie’s tunnel vision and muscle memory allowed him to slink past the usual bustle on the sidewalks, it wasn’t different from San Francisco- but there were much more street performers and drunk bastards at all hours of the day roaming around.
Somewhere along his walk into Liberty Park he is caught off guard by a somewhat familiar voice, and when it registers the older gentleman in his view he can’t help the smile that flickers across his face.
“Mr. Burnrow…A little early for your nightly walk, no?” Eddie utters as he is approached by the gentlemen, who seem just as happy to see the younger man.
“My daughter was getting worried about how late I was staying out…didn’t want her defenseless old dad getting mugged in some back alley.” The older man says with a chuckle, his long sleeved cardigan being gently gripped tighter as his separate hand kept a firm grip on his cane.
Looking at the old man’s leg which usually only gave him a minor limp, it seemed progressively harder to move as if a chain was dragging behind him. Eddie offers up his arm for the older man to hold onto and he takes it with a fond smile as he gently pats the sleeve of the dirty hoodie he was wearing.
“And maybe my body isn’t up for these walks anymore…” The elder man’s voice became dejected as they walked in slow steps, Eddie steering them toward the bench he always saw the gentleman resting upon.
“You made it out today…I’m sure Henry would be proud…” Eddie responds, using his knowledge of the other’s past he shared in their encounters and earns an enamored smile as the older man’s eyes gaze over to the water, like they reflected something other than their bodies walking along.
Reaching the seat, Mr. Burnrow sits down with a grunt- the kind every father seems to possess in their vocab before he gently taps the spot next to him and Eddie quickly shuffles to the spot.
“This was where he asked me out…had our first date here an hour after that after picking up some chinese to enjoy on this very seat…” The man’s voice wavers off, his mind trailing into a distant memory, a sight Eddie was sure he adorned most times he is accompanied at this location.
Eddie’s eyes move from the man to the statue he came to see, it was so far away…but yet he felt Venom so close…even when he got one of those boat riders to get up close- it was nothing like seeing it in all of its entirety- he imagined how venom would love to have climbed it…to rush up the side like nothing while Eddie did his best to avoid looking at the ground.
“He…” The words seem to fail Eddie but he finds them eventually, “-he’d want you to take care of yourself…make sure you’re not hurting another leg trying to climb the subway stairs.”
The older man quickly looks at him, a playfully irritated look in his expression as he gently elbowed the younger man. “I was trying to get back before my ice cream melted, you can’t blame me for not wanting to waste my mint chips.”
They both softly laugh, the most genuine Eddie’s laugh in a long while.
As the laughter settled to silence, both of them set their gaze back to the statue in the distance, the orange glow of the setting sun framing the oxidized copper perfectly.
“You know…that friend of yours would want you doing the same…” Mr. Burnrow says suddenly, breaking the silence as he rests his aged hand onto Eddie’s, the warm skin against Eddie’s cold one sending a chill down his spine.
For a moment, Eddie feels a long lost rush…like he felt the rippling of symbiote under his flesh- but he is quick to realize it's just the chill of the contact…not many people would approach him…and if they did most didn’t want to touch him assuming he was some homeless man.
“Yeah…you’re probably right…” Eddie answers as he smiles at the man beside him, placing his free hand onto the gentlemen’s forearm. It's only now he really notices the state of his hoodie, the stains and muck on his sleeves, some even hidden by the roles of the fabric.
“...you-” Mr.Burnrow attempts to speak but something stops him, perhaps he felt Eddie tightly grasp the sweatpants under his fingertips- or maybe the way Eddie's face loosened and a soft sorrow filled gaze watched the elder.
“You know…my daughter told me something that helped me feel better about my husband’s death…Grief is just love with no place to go…I loved him so much…but he was no longer there to receive it…so instead she said I should find someway to channel that love to other things…at first I thought it was impossible…but eventually I did it…I found hobbies and people to share my love with. Maybe doing the same might help… I know you loved him…and I'm sure he loves you…so channel it.”
The two share a gaze, one of understanding- one that spoke of their shared grief.
For a while they just sit in silence, the occasional hum leaving the Older man’s mouth as they watch the sun sink lower and lower in the sky.
Mr. Burnrow rises after a few minutes, just before the sun slinks into the depths- bracing his cane on the ground before he looks to Eddie.
“Take care of yourself, son.”
Eddie offers a nod to the man, and watches him slink back into the street- his limp now back to normal as he saunters home.
The man sits upon the seat for a bit longer, watching the sun fully sink into night before the sky is taken by darkness. He rises from his seat and he feels heavy…the weight of the conversation quite literally keeps him from another step and he offers a final glance to the statue.
“I love you buddy…”
After a few deep breaths he is able to walk away from the seat, and finds his way back home…letting the feeling of muscle memory lead him home- letting his mind autopilot till he shut the door behind himself and locked the door.
He still feels heavy…and looking around at the messy apartment doesn’t help the overwhelming feeling. It was all too much…it would take him all night and all day to make this place live-able again…to love this place…
“Babysteps…” Eddie whispered to himself, walking over to his dresser and finding a fresh pair of clothes in the mess of clothes he just shoved inside.
After scrambling for those he heads to the bathroom and pushes past some dirty clothes and looks to the shower.
“He would want this…he would also want to eat brains…but he’d probably want us to be taken care of more…” He says to himself before looking at the shower.
“...babysteps..”
-=-
Eddie
The dream called out to him, this was one of his recurring ones. One where he is desperately trying to grab for Venom’s tendril…and it's just out of reach.
Eddie!
They’re in the void- not even the desecrated military base surrounding him like it was when he reached for him for the last time.
EDDIE!
The tendril is a mere inch from his hand- but he just can’t reach- shouting is futile as his mouth is opening but sound can’t escape.
Suddenly the tendril is swiftly pulled back into the void, and then an explosion sounds off out of view- and Eddie can almost feel the heat sizzling his body as the door he was given now appears above him.
As always, Eddie awakes from the dream, clutching the blanket in his hand before quickly releasing it. He feels hungover? Did he drink after the shower? Why couldn’t he remember what happened after he got in…
He yanks the blanket off of himself as the heat is becoming unbearable, he stands up to go turn the AC on- assuming it had just turned off but it was on…and running full blast…
“We must have hit our head in the shower…”
We?.... You still remember me?
Eddie freezes as the all too familiar voice thumps in his mind- for a moment he can’t discern if it’s truly Venom or just some hallucination his brain has conspired to appease his grief stricken heart.
Suddenly, a small black tendril appears from Eddie’s shoulder and cups his face, and Eddie quickly accepts as he hugged it just to see if it was truly that all too familiar goo…and the way the slime melded to his fingers told him he was home.
“Buddy! I missed you…I-i…” Tears streamed down his cheeks as he struggled to form sentences, and the alien gently shushed him, already knowing what his thoughts were.
I love you too, Eddie…
Eddie flushes after the words are spoken but refuses to remove his hands from the alien's limb as he answers.
“I wasn’t gonna rush in with that…but…yeah…I do…”
For a moment, they relish each other’s company, just enjoying the quiet as Eddie’s skin makes contact with the inky goo.
Eddie finally breaks the silence by asking a question…
“Wait…how did you survive?”
Cockroach! Those motherfuckers are strong.
